Monday, February 25, 2008

Call center transcripts

I could not stop laughing after seeing these call center transcripts today. Yes, they're real!

Hi, thanks for calling Target GiftCards, my name is Jamie, how can I help you?
--I WANA CHECK DE BALANCE ON MY GIFTKERD.
Okay, can I have the number on the back of the card starting with 041 please?
--BBEEP BOOP BEEP BEEP (Lady is actually punching in the numbers on her phone)
Oh, ma'am, I need you to read me the numbers, ok?
--123,456,789,*0#
I need the number starting with 041, found on the back of the CARD.
--THER'S NO NUMBER LIKE THAT.
Flip the card over, on the back, you should see a strip that says 'Gently remove to check balance.' Some need to be pulled off, others need to be scratched off. Carefully remove it and read me the number, ok?
-She finally reads the number-
Great, there's twelve cents on the card.
**Silence**
--THANKS *Click*
____________________________________________________________________________

Thanks for calling Target Wireless, my name is Jamie, how can I help you?
--Yeah there's a problem with my Recharge Card. It's not accepting it.
Okay, can I have the PIN please.
--*Relays PIN*
Sorry sir, the system is saying that the number doesn't match any card on record... The next time you go to Target, just take the card along with you and the clerk can reactivate it for you.
--But, I didn't get this card at Target.
What!?
--Yeah, I got it at K-Mart.
Uh, call K-Mart? This is Target, sir.
--Oh, ok.


Hit, Read More! if you just can't get enough.

And for one that's not so funny, but still good:

Thanks for calling Target ClearRX, my name is Jamie, how can I help you?

YEAH HI WHAT SHOULD I DO I JUST BOUGHT SOME ANTIBIOTICS FROM YOUR PHARMACY, AND NOW I AM BLEEDING FROM THE ANUS PROFUSELY AND I CAN'T SEE STRAIGHT FROM LOSS OF BLOOD, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Uh, you need to hang up and call 911 immediately, sir! Get yourself to a hospital!

WELL, WHY CAN'T YOU HELP ME!? WHAT SHOULD I DO!?

Sir, I'm not qualified to give you medical advice, you need to call --

WELL WHY THE NOT!? OH NO, I'M SEEING BLACK SPOTS! BLOOD IS EVERYWHERE!

Because I'm not a Pharmacist sir! I'm a 19 year old kid in a call center! I'm going to disconnect this immediately so you can call 911! CALL YOURSELF AN AMBULANCE!
*Click*

I hope he's ok!

46 comments:

Reward Rebel said...

It does make you wonder how some people even make it through the day, doesn’t it?

Some time ago, at work, we’d distributed discs with files on for use by participating hospices, and a would-be user phoned me to say she couldn’t access the files. So I asked her whereabouts on her PC’s hard drive she had saved the files. She informed me that she hadn’t saved them. “OK, you’re using the disc”, I say. “Yes”, she tells me.

So I try instructing her through the steps to access the files via the A drive. After going through every possible permutation to get at them, I suggested that the disc must be damaged, and I’d despatch a replacement. At this point she mentioned that the disc wasn’t in the drive!

There are people to whom technology will forever be a foreign country, and they just don’t speak the language;-D

Rich said...

Wow that sounds really frustrating. I know I'm probably illiterate in some way, just haven't figured out what it is yet.

Traveller said...

I think some people call just because they're lonely ;D

bulitas said...

lols. there sure is a scarcity of common sense nowadays. =) people should chillax a little and veer away from their stressful activities once in a while.

Cindy said...

Wow- how do these people survive out in the world?!

customer care representative said...

For me, a transcript is only use as a guide to make a call transaction flow with pattern and properly. But natural way of transaction (i mean, speaking like you are not reading anything) is still the best to convince a customer.

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Now a days everywhere technology is required. Not only technology but advance technology.In order to maintain and provide good customer service call centers also require good and fast call center software . Because if call centers will not be technology upgraded they can not maintain their good service and yes not any customer wants poor service.

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Ridiculous!How people are like this.Complacency can seep in from either side, i.e. the client as well as the service provider. If the objective is to unlock the full potential of call center services, both clients and service providers will thus have to work together and undertake initiatives to eliminate complacency.

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Peter Von Zipper said...

i work for a philippine call center and i have had my share of funny calls from customers as well... hahaha thanks for sharing..

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call center philippines said...

Funny calls with customers will always be remembered. This makes me reminisce.